What is it with Mutual?

For those of you who don't know - I'm in YM presidancy in my ward and it has been both fun and a struggle over the past several months. The average age of our ward is 73 and I believe we've got a few members who remember when Brigham Young was prophet. There are very few young couples and fewer families with mutual age kids. On Sundays we have two young men who we can count on and the others - well it depends on what's going down at the skate park near by, or what show is playing at the dollar movie.

Mutual night though tends to be a little better, but it's still a struggle. When we started with opening exercises, the YW presidancy was there, the bishop, me and our Scoutmaster, three YW and one YM. Our kids tend to be a little rough around the edges because of our neighborhood, but I just don't get or understand why they don't want to come. I remember being a kid and looking forward to mutual night. Growing up outside of Utah it was about the only time you got to see your church friends other than Sundays. Maybe my leaders felt like they were forcing us to do things, but I remember telling them what we wanted to do, where we wanted to go camping and so on.

These boys could care less. All they want to know is if there is going to be food. Half the problem is many of these youth come from split member families, or their parents aren't even active, but encourage them to come. I just don't know what to do.

Tonight we had a planning meeting for the next three months with two boys, myself, the Scoutmaster and another member of the presidancy. We've got some fun things planned, but it's still going to be like pulling teeth for these boys to actually come. Last week for instance we had a joint activity with the YW at the park where we had pizza and played water games. It was a lot of fun and I must say - I was the wettest of anyone there! Half way through - one of the YM calls and asked if I'd come pick him up - which I did because I feel that's where they need to be. But I just don't get why these kids do not want to come to mutual, or church. It's super hard, so if any of you have advice that you can give - my ears are open. I'm sure it's a struggle in most wards now days with cell phones, computer games and all sorts of activities, but what can we do to help these youth realize that these are important times of their lives. Times where they'll look back and remember for the rest of their lives.

I so remember summer camp and the pranks Kimball and I would pull. I remember everyone trying to figure out who was up to it and no one suspected it was us. I remember tieing Basil Dulaney to his cot, carrying him out of his tent and then getting half way to the outhouse (where we were going to put him) and his cot folding right in half. I don't think Kimball or I have ran faster in our lives.

I remember shooting guns at the US Marshall gun range with Brother Ottie and Brother Smith. I remember campouts to Slipper Falls, Turner Falls and Camp Grayson. Survival campouts whre we ate dirt, leaves, bark and the last night chased a chicken, plucked it and ate it (that's the only animal I've ever killed on purpose - yes I had the honor of chopping its head off - wait do fish count?) . I remember making buddy burners and cooking pancakes on them, frying eggs and sausage. There are so many wonderful memories that I wouldn't trade for anything and I'm so grateful I had wonderful leaders who cared and did these things with us.

I just wished our boys would have as much energy and excitement about mutual as I did and as I think my friends had. I would hate for them to look back on their childhood, and teen years and not have some of the fun stories to tell, or share with their friends like I do. I hope it's not me, or any of the other men that make them feel like they're not welcome. How do you let someone know you want them there? How do you foster the support my leaders fostered when I was a youth. I'm still new to this calling and I hope I can be a leader the YM will look back on and will have fun memories of. I just wish I knew what to do to help them and to let them know I care. Until next time.

Cheers,
Ian